21 May 2010

Begin with basmallah….
Wow, long time no see…. So missing to write anything I have done and so many thing I felt. My Lord… There was so many thing that I wanna tell You. Bout my heart, my feelings, my activity. I realized that nothing happened without U want. Sometime I feel happy and so powerfull, but sometime we feel so blue and weak. But I trusted, if I walking to You, You will running closely…
My Lord, I didn’t know why I have done it… I know I wrong, bcz it made systemic effect, but I don’t understand, why they must tell about it repeatly. It does not make my feeling better, but just make it worse.
I don’t wanna judge them, but just the opposite, I feel so guilty with my self.
Hmm…I don’t wanna tell more exactly about it. It’s still morning. I must build up positive suggestion for better way today.
Heart is like a quiet lake. But, sometime a fallin leave will make it swaying, unstabled. Moreover, if sometime a big stone fallin till the deep of the lake, it will make it shaky and snoring. Nevertheless, I believe that it will calm again. Although, it need more time to do that. Allah gave us pearl in the deep of the lake. No one known how deep our heart, and nobody can pick our pearl. It just we can measure how deep our heart, it just we can see the pearl, although we don’t necessary have to diving it. We just can feel the pearl shining in the dark of our deep heart, it showing us the right path that we must passing. It ‘fitrah’ from The Only One Lord in this world. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala…
Wallahu ‘alam bisshawwabb…